What No One Tells You About Growing Up...

It's terrifying.
Have you ever graduated from college?? Okay, this is my first time, so maybe I'm over-exaggerating. But, I'm pretty sure I'm having the same breakdown that every college graduate has. My heart and mind are being tugged in three different directions: 
Assignments are all due next Tuesday or Wednesday. Trash.
I just booked a flight to Korea and now have to prepare myself to leave after Christmas. Trash.
Graduation is next week which means announcements need to be mailed, and parties need to be planned. Trash.


I'm trying to do a piece of all three of these things each day until next Tuesday or Wednesday, and as soon as I finish my assignments and have booked my flight (check, by the way) and have mailed all letters and planned the two parties, I'm taking a really long nap. Praise the Lord. So, from Wednesday around 6 to Thursday around noon, consider me gone. I'm sleeping and not talkin' to anybody. Yup, that's my plan.


Now don't get me wrong. I am beyond excited about walking across that stage and proudly stating that I am finally a college grad. I am beyond excited to pack up my dorm room for the very last time and never have to go back. I am beyond excited to go to Korea. I am beyond excited about being in Byers near my church family and my Aaron.


I am also extremely sad. 


I'm gonna miss talks with my PaePae, walking into her office, closing the door and drawing the blinds because I cannot hold in my tears long enough to make it to my room; seeing her apartment door cracked and excitedly jumping on the couch next to her to watch whatever random thing is on her television; chanting, "Da Pae Pae" along with the rest of my Guynes family. I'm gonna miss my Pastor Peggy.


I'm gonna miss playin' racqball and studying with Maxey, getting texts from Alicia asking for my cheer help, listening to great speakers in chapel, smiling and talking to Ms. Minnie, Ms. Pat, Ms. Prudy, the smiley guy in the main line, and all of the other caf workers. 


I'm gonna miss the entire English Department--Ms. Bernecker, Ms. Jones, Mrs. George, Cameron Bishop, Dr. Montgomery, Dr. Amy and Dr. A, and most of all, Mrs. Lewis, my boss and my friend, who has helped mold and guide my college experience through prayer and advice about academics and simply life.


I'm gonna miss my roommates--gosh I've had a bunch of them--who have helped define my college years. My Anon, who has been my roommate for 2 years, who has become so much more of a woman than she was 2 years ago, who keeps me accountable and who has become my best friend--who says friends can't be roommates? Ha, the key is to be a roommate first, and then a friend. We have made a habit of leaving for summer and barely staying in touch then picking up where we left off when we see each other again. I'm really good at doing that with most people. But, in this case, she and I have to work on staying in touch. Because this time, I'm not leaving then coming back after winter...and that's so weird and saddening.


Your definition of growing up may be different, and your experience in growing up may be different. But, take each moment in stride because the joy that comes in growing up has an extreme sadness alongside it. Enjoy each happiness ya have before you have to leave it--that's for any moment in life. :)